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‘Mountaintop Motel Massacre’ (1986) Movie Review

kinopoisk.ru

Written & Directed by Jim McCullough Jr.

Starring: Bill Thurman, Anna Chappell, and Will Mitchell

After several years in an insane asylum, Evelyn, the keeper of the Mountaintop Motel, is released and resumes doing business. She kills her young charge out of anger, but convinces the police it was an accident – and pushed into insanity, she then proceeds to target her guests, first by releasing vermin into their rooms, but then by using her trusty sickle… Written by Brian J. Wright

This is basically a chance for my wife and I to watch a terrible horror movie and create our own R rated MST3000. Believe it or not, the first act was not without its moments. Some of the remedial artwork and overall mood are kind of creepy. Luckily, the rest of the movie is so super shitty, that’s you’ll forget there was ever a glimmer of hope. Set in Texas or Louisiana or Tennessee or Kentucky, or anywhere on The Appalachian Trail is The Mountaintop Motel, a dilapidated shack that charges seven American dollars for a night of, uh, rustic comfort. You can practically feel the eventual Brown Recluse bite. In standard horror order, a “diverse” group of customers all find reasons to consciously stay at this hotel.

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This doesn’t look terrifying, but the scarecrow actually planted this garden.

I think with the exception of a stoner, they got a good group. There’s the drunken pastor, token black carpenter, two coeds, a recently married couple, and a shady ad exec who doesn’t mind lying about being the owner of Columbia Records if it means a little coed tail comes his way. No one does any coming since the murder countdown begins before the first crack of thunder. The kills are moronic, never using any creativity of any kind. The blood doesn’t look like real blood, the snozberries don’t taste like real snozzberries, and about 18% of the actors can act. It’s perfect storm of B movie proportions.

When all is said and murdered, this schlocky horror flick is good for nothing but a nice night of “Add Your Own Commentary”. No one is any richer for the experience, no one meets their soul mate, friends don’t become enemies, enemies don’t become friends, and no one knows who activates the power to the neon motel sign during the credits. This is classic 1986 B movie making at it’s best/worst.

About Fister Roboto (2231 Articles)
Just ring it up with the dong tea...

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