One..Two..Freddy’s Closing Costs Will Put a Hurtin’ on You

Indulge me, let me say this is your…”dream” home. Sorry. All kidding aside, you, yes, you, can live in same home occupied by Nancy Thompson from the 1984 horror classic: A Nightmare on Elm Street. The Los Angeles home is now on the market and it can be yours for $2.1 million dollars. Too much to pay for a deed to horror history? For me, yes. What is the running mortgage payment for a house that pricey? Once again, more than this high-functioning internet dipshit can afford.

The home touts a lot of renovations, but leaves the Wes Craven facade intact for the most part. The home features three bedrooms, three and a quarter bathrooms (dead kids only need 1/4 the room make mookies), a pool (blood-free), a pimped out master suite, guest house, and walnut floors. You’ll have to check the basement yourself. Muhahahaha! Or ask the realtor, that’s probably easier.

The scariest thing about this place? The framed Sex Pistols print.